…..And so it goes another week…..i just found out that my other nice sister, the one in Arizona, is moving for the next five months to a place where she will have no phone, no internet, because it’s a job for both her and her husband, as they need the money, and now i will have to communicate via old school snail mail with her….something i don’t have the spoons to do at all anymore. I am devastated that she didn’t take the time to freakin’ tell me this. She called my mom and told her, but not me. So sick of the way i am treated and shunned and overlooked by my family!!
You know what i hate? Is when people who turn against me, are always so quick to tell me that
i am selfish,
i am rude and demanding,
that i use my Autism as an excuse,
that i hide behind my Autism,
that i lie and twist things,
that i would do better if i just tried harder,
that i need to grow up,
if only these people got off of their high horses long enough to realize with Autism,
we have alot of fears, phobias, hangups, routines, and rituals.
These things are magnified and amplified ten to 100’s of times more than how it is for the normal person.
We are not selfish, but our world is very precious to us, far more so than a normal person’s is because our world is our safe zone where we go to escape the harshness of the NT world, who for the most part still refuses to get us, to treat us as the human beings we are.
I also don’t lack empathy and compassion.
I also have a sense of humor.
And i happen to care about others more than you in the NT world know.
I am not stupid, nor is my hearing bad, i am just wired differently.
My meltdowns happen when people won’t
take the time to listen to me,
really hear me, and respect me where i am at…..
when NT people try to problem solve, cure, and fix me,
or they tell me i need to just grow up and “get over it!”.
They don’t realize it is hard, if not impossible for me to get over things that happen, especially when they happen one on top of another. Or when people move my things or buy the wrong brand of dish soap or other things i like.
Wake up….because we are going to tell our stories. Listen to us. Hear us.
We MATTER. We have a voice. And we have every right to exist and live happy fulfilled lives!!